Hi, this is Monique Rhodes. Welcome to the In Your Right Mind Podcast, where we're learning how to be happier by working with our minds.
If you'd like to know more about what I teach, come to iintendtobehappy.com and let’s get you started on a path to being happier.
When Someone You Love Changes
A listener asked me:
“How do I keep loving someone when they’re no longer who they used to be?”
It’s tender, isn’t it?
To love someone through their becoming.
To not hold on to who they once were.
To stay present with who they are now.
The Small Funerals of Who We Were
We attend little funerals every day:
Old selves dissolving.
Roles that no longer fit.
Identities that fade.
And sometimes, it hurts—
We miss the laughter.
We miss the fire.
We miss the confidence.
But no one can return to who they were.
We are all reshaped, moment by moment.
Love That Holds Space
Real love isn’t about clinging to a fixed version of someone.
It’s about:
Witnessing their unfolding.
Holding space for their uncertainty.
Staying steady when they’re unraveling.
Love deepens when it says:
“I will walk with you, even here, even now, even like this.”
The Grace We Offer Ourselves Too
And remember—
We’re also changing.
We’re also grieving old versions of ourselves.
We also need kindness in our own becoming.
And the kindness we crave for ourselves
is the kindness we can give to others.
The Practice of True Companionship
It’s not always easy:
We’ll ache for the past.
We’ll miss who someone used to be.
We’ll long for the version that felt simpler.
But if we allow space for the truth of change,
our relationships become more peaceful.
Not because they’re simple—
But because they’re real.
A Gentle Reflection
Ask yourself today:
Can I stay with someone, not just for who they were—
but for who they are right now?Can I offer myself that same grace?
Because love, real love,
walks beside both.
I hope this has been helpful.
As always, be kind, take care, and go gently in the world.
