Hi, this is Monique Rhodes. Welcome to the In Your Right Mind Podcast, where we're learning how to be happier by working with our minds.
If you'd like to know more about what I teach, come to moniquerhodes.com and let's help you get a little bit happier.
Always Fixing, Never Enough
A student came to me yesterday and said something that stopped me in my tracks.
She said she always feels like she has to fix herself.
That it’s holding her back from fully living.
And I thought—this is something we need to talk about.
This Very Moment is Sacred
We think the sacred moment is somewhere else—
- When we’ve healed more.
- When we’re less reactive.
- When our bodies look different.
- When we’ve got life figured out.
But it’s not in the future.
And it’s not in the past.
It’s right here.
- This messy, honest, imperfect, beautiful moment.
This is where life is happening.
And it’s asking you to show up.
You Are Not a Project
So many of us treat ourselves like unfinished projects.
We carry scorecards, always measuring, always waiting—
To become someone we can finally accept.
But if you’re always relating to yourself as someone who needs fixing—
You’ll never learn how to just be with yourself.
The Radical Shift
What changes everything?
Not the perfect plan.
Not the breakthrough insight.
But this:
- Turning toward yourself with curiosity instead of critique.
- With gentleness instead of judgment.
Can you see yourself—just as you are—and meet that with compassion?
The Foundation of Every Relationship
The relationship you have with your mind and heart—
That’s the foundation for every relationship in your life.
If you reject yourself, the world feels harsh.
If you accept yourself, the world softens.
You don’t have to love every thought.
You don’t have to approve of every choice.
But you do have to stop treating yourself as the enemy.
Kindness to Who’s Already Here
You don’t need to wait to become someone else.
You can begin now—with kindness.
- Kindness to the person who’s already here.
- Kindness to the parts of you that feel vulnerable or scared.
When you do that, life begins to open.
Not because it becomes certain—
But because you’re not bracing against it anymore.
You Can Stop Fighting Yourself
When you stop abandoning yourself—
You realize you don’t have to control everything to feel safe.
You see that peace doesn’t come from fixing—
It comes from presence.
- Staying present in the waves.
- Surfing, not running.
- Being intimate with the truth of your life.
And maybe, most of all—
You begin to understand this:
You can stop fighting yourself.
Presence is the Path
What if life isn’t asking you to be more before you’re worthy?
What if it’s asking you to be with yourself so fully, so tenderly—
That your presence becomes your path?
Because when you make peace with yourself—
You begin to make peace with life.
And in a world that trains us to always be more, do more, fix more—
That is a profoundly radical act.
I hope this has been helpful. As always, be kind, take care, and go gently in the world.
