Hi, this is Monique Rhodes. Welcome to the In Your Right Mind podcast, where we’re learning how to be happier by working with our minds. If you’d like to know more about what I teach, visit moniquerhodes.com. There, you’ll find a wealth of resources to help you on your journey toward happiness.
One of my students recently reached out, sharing that she was struggling to see kindness in the world. She felt overwhelmed by the suffering and negativity she encountered and was beginning to lose faith in humanity. She described feeling as though goodness and kindness were being overshadowed by division and hostility.
First, I want to acknowledge how difficult this can be. It’s deeply disheartening to feel like generosity, care, and decency are missing, especially when you value those qualities so deeply. It’s natural to want the world to reflect back the goodness you hope exists. But here’s a truth that can shift how you experience this: The world often mirrors what we put into it.
If we want to see more kindness, trust, and openness, we must first embody those qualities ourselves. This isn’t easy, especially when we feel depleted, but choosing to embody what we wish to see can profoundly influence how the world responds to us.
Kindness Is Reciprocal
When you look around and see a lack of kindness, it’s tempting to retreat or withhold your own kindness out of fear that it will go unnoticed or be taken for granted. But here’s the paradox: the more we withhold the goodness we want to see, the less likely we are to experience it. Kindness is reciprocal—but someone has to start the cycle.
Think of kindness as a ripple. Even a small act—a gentle word, a thoughtful gesture—sends ripples outward, often reaching further than we realize. The kindness you offer might not be returned immediately or in the way you expect, but it creates a pattern. Over time, it invites more of that energy into your life.
Ask Yourself: Am I Being the Kindness I Want to See?
This isn’t about blaming yourself or suggesting you’re not already kind. It’s about intentionally choosing to embody the qualities you feel are missing. When you show up with kindness, you become a magnet for it. People respond to the energy you bring, often reflecting it back to you in surprising ways.
This doesn’t mean every interaction will go perfectly or that the world will suddenly transform overnight. But the more you live out the values you care about, the more you’ll notice those same values around you.
The Power of Small Acts
Being the kindness you wish to see doesn’t require grand gestures or constant effort. Often, the smallest actions make the biggest impact—not just on others, but on how you experience the world.
- Smile at someone you pass on the street.
- Hold the door open for a stranger.
- Offer a compliment to someone.
- Listen attentively without thinking about your next response.
- Leave a small gift or note for a friend.
These small acts might seem insignificant, but they’re incredibly powerful. They anchor you in the reality that kindness exists and remind others—who may also be struggling to see kindness—that it’s still out there.
Training Your Mind to See Kindness
Our minds naturally scan for threats and negativity—a survival instinct. But with practice, we can train ourselves to notice the good. By actively looking for moments of kindness, even small ones, we begin to rewrite the story our minds tell us about the world.
Practicing kindness regularly sharpens your awareness of when and where it’s happening. It opens your heart to see that while the world isn’t perfect, there are pockets of goodness all around.
Kindness in Difficult Moments
Being kind isn’t always easy, especially when you’re feeling worn down or discouraged by the world’s harshness. In these moments, kindness might feel like a risk, as though you’re giving something that won’t be returned. But it’s in these moments that kindness matters most—for both others and yourself.
Choosing kindness doesn’t mean ignoring pain or pretending everything is okay. It means deciding that no matter how the world shows up, you’ll choose to be a source of light. This choice is incredibly powerful because it gives you agency. You don’t have to wait for the world to be kind—you get to create it in your own way.
The Ripple Effect of Kindness
This idea extends beyond kindness to qualities like trust, reliability, and generosity. If you want to draw trustworthy people into your life, live with integrity. If you want to find welcoming people, be open and warm. The world responds to the energy you put out. The more you embody the qualities you value, the more you’ll see them reflected back.
This doesn’t mean you’ll never encounter unkindness or disappointment. The world isn’t perfect, and people aren’t always their best selves. But when you show up as the person you wish to meet, you create a ripple effect that can transform how you experience life.
Kindness Starts With You
The fact that you long for kindness is evidence of your own goodness. That goodness is a gift you can offer to the world. Even when kindness feels scarce, you have the power to create it, embody it, and share it. The world won’t always be kind, but your kindness can reignite it.
Over time, as you practice becoming the qualities you wish to see in the world, kindness will begin to appear in places you never expected. It might be subtle at first, but it will grow. And as it grows, so will your faith in the goodness of the world.
Start Small, but Start
Be the kindness you want to see, even if it feels like no one else is doing it. Trust that your efforts matter. The ripples you create will reach further than you realize. The kindness you put into the world is never wasted—it always comes back, often in ways more beautiful than you could imagine.
I hope this has been helpful. If you enjoy this podcast, I’d appreciate it if you could leave a rating. As always, be kind, take care, and go gently in the world.
